Prison Pete

Tuesday, April 26, 2005
  Back to Frank.
There are two new guys that have arrived in the last two weeks. One guy, Hispanic, is now on the top bunk over Frank, right next to me. The other guy, white, is also on a top bunk one over from Frank. The three of us have already agreed to pool together on a few rice and bean meals.

This morning while waiting for chow, one of them made a comment about Frank being a real pain in the ass. The other guy agreed and I did not even solicit that remark. Sometimes it is the other guy. Although, if I was to mention this escapade to Mom and Dad, they would immediately make a comment to the effect, "What did you do to him, Pete?"

Damn, I just realized I not only have not gone back to print what is now three pages long, I forgot to start a new file for each page as I have been doing in the past to prevent any data loss. Oh well, I am on a roll now. Let us hope the typewriter will cooperate.

(Be careful what you wish for. Not only did I not stop what I was doing at this point and get what I had typed printed out, I continued to fill this page. I have made changes to the original letter, but the above paragraph was originally on the top of the fourth page. I had been beginning to edit page two when the machine ate my work.)

Last night when the commissary sheets were handed out, I did not make any attempt to see what foods Frank wanted me to buy. I got together with the two new guys and asked them if they wanted to chip in for some bean and rice meals. They only had $5 and $10 to spend, but at thirty-four cents for a can of beans, they each brought three cans. I will kick in some rice, cheese, and chips. (I did do up a bean and rice dish today for lunch, and they seemed to like it.)

Frank did make a comment to his bunkie, not me, if he could get in on the bean deal. He said sure, and then Frank said he could not eat beans.

When my Sunday NY Times arrived, I still gave Frank the Book Review section to read. The point is, I am still giving those things that I have in the past to Frank, so as not to get into a "you're not my friend anymore" type of mindset. I have given up hope of joining in on the spaghetti meals and downgraded my involvement with Frank and he may or may not change the way he is dealing with me. I am losing the hot meals that I liked, but I am getting stepped on and put down a lot less.

I am still not being as clear as I want to be, and perhaps I should actually "study" (as in formal class work) the subject of human relationships, but I do feel I have some qualifications that allow me to speak to the subject. Yes, occasionally I put my foot in my mouth, or based on some of the feedback I get from you, fail miserably to clearly make my point.

The one thing I do feel is that even when I try a new approach to a situation, there is still some of the old behavior there. For example, even though I wrote that I was not worried about your recent gap in writing to me, toward the end I mentioned, "I hope the silence was due to you being busy and not some lame ass thing I wrote in one of my letters."

At least I did not whine (did I?) in every letter. If nothing else I think whatever I did write was certainly a lot less manic then in previous letters. If that is not true, then I am just as delusional as ever and not working at my more annoying character traits.
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