Isolation.
The isolation here is both physical, and psychological. My day-to-day world revolves around seeing the same 100 inmates, and ten to fifteen staff members. It is amazing how 'confining' and 'draining' that can be.
I have now been trying to get to see the doctor for over three weeks and will be signing up for sick-call for the fourth time tonight. I have been suffering from swelling sinuses for the entire month. The problem is definitely the 'air quality' here in the dorm.
I go out and walk, and by the end of the walk my nose is wide open and I can breathe through my nose without too much difficulty. By this time, (5:45 PM) I can just barely take air in through my nose, and trying to blow it is like hitting a brick wall. No air or other matter exits the nose. It is like a check valve allowing air in out not out.
Even the air in tends to be problematic in that while the nose is not stuffed up in the traditional sense, I get just enough post nasal drip to cause a cough or gag type reflex. This makes eating also a problem.
Once I obtain full sinus swelling, then the headaches start. It does seem to help if I am horizontal as opposed to vertical, so that leaves lying on the bed and reading as the only comfortable activity.
The medical problem is that for some reason they have removed the cute little two-pill packs of decongestant. The last time into sick call, the nurse gave me a handful of combination pills. They contain non-aspirin, antihistamine, and some decongestant. Since my problem is strictly the swelled sinuses, all I need is the decongestant. Maybe the fourth time will be the charm.
My parents. Yeah of course they are part of the funk. Besides the growing sense that they are not actually READING my letters, it was obvious by what they wrote that they were putting the clippings I was sending in the round-to-it pile. Then they never seem to get read. I am sending these articles to them to not only give them things I think they will enjoy reading, but also to show that I am actually reading each and every paper.
I know I have a rotten track record at following through on projects and I want them to know the money for the paper is not going to waste. They are actually penalizing me $25.00 a month for the cost of the paper. They are only sending me $100 a month instead of the $125 I was getting at Club Fed.
Here I do not have the option of earning any additional money, so I am really functioning on much less money. It is somewhat an arbitrary decision on my parent’s part, as opposed to an educated amount based on what I should be able to buy.