Thursday evening here and I thought I would drop you a line.
I am too lazy to look at what I last sent you, so hopefully I am not repeating myself. I have not been able to get my act together and put the last few months of letters in order and so I am not following any previous thoughts.
My mom managed to send me two letters last month, with the second one arriving on Christmas Eve. The big issue in that letter was that they are trying to sell the house and while I might have had a slim hope of living there with mom, the other problem is the few worldly possessions I still have are stored there. The biggest loss would be my tool collection but I have asked Mom to see to it if there is any way they can be stored.
The last thing I wrote to my Mom about was how she felt about the possibility of living someplace with me as her caretaker?
The last time I brought the issue up was near the end of the fed time, and at that point my parents expressed their desire to be on their own. They were more than willing to provide support both monetary and emotional to get me a place to live, but did not want to have me living with them. There may have been other "issues" (such as tension with my siblings etc.) but that was never verbalized.
Of course there is the whole issue of Mom wanting to live with me? I am not exactly sure what financial shape Mom is in right now, and I am not being included in any of the plans for disposing of any of the contents of the house.
Okay that last paragraph was a little off. I am not sure what Mom's financial status is at this point. I know she has her own pension and Social Security, but am not sure if any part of Dad's pension carries over. I am not being included in any thoughts as to the dispersion of the "family heirlooms" but certainly hope at least my property will be saved. While it is certainly a long shot I could be a free man come this November.
As I have said before, I am due to see the Parole Board in August and will see a parole officer around May to discuss my plans if I am released. So on the one hand I have little hope of being release this year but I have to have some sort of plan in place for the parole people to chew on. The economy is certainly not going to be any help at all. With an abundance of job seekers, especially on the low end of the pay scale, who is going to bother with a felon. So how does one deal with all this very practical stuff which carries all sorts of emotional weight too.
This is my from of mind of late and I would not mind just losing it all and sitting in a padded room strumming my lips and going "blub-blub-blub" or however you would convey the sound one makes as one strumming lips and say "blah blah."
Well that is all for now. I am off to shower and then to bed.
Oh the leg. I finally saw a physical therapist. He was puzzled as to how my leg was not healing given no other pathology and also wondered what he was supposed to do? He did some evaluation maneuvers and said I looked very good considering the leg. He is recommending me to another specialist since it does appear my right leg is now a little, but noticeably, shorter. I mention that one possible scenario was that I thought if I must eventually have the hip replacement surgery, I would be better off if I first got the strength back to all the various muscles that have been lying around without use for the past eight months. He said that made sense.
So for now I can walk around without the crutches. I have less of a limp, which tells me I did well using the two crutches to keep me from learning to walk with a limp. I get very wiped out when I do stand or walk for a couple hours without the use of the crutches.
On Monday, I helped put away some of the Christmas decorations up in the chapel, and yesterday was on my feet at the stove cooking three pounds of ziti which served seven. I had to chop and slice two pepperoni sticks, one summer sausage beef log, two onions, and two peppers. Not really all that big a deal if you are in a regular kitchen, but try doing that without any metal knives. Only the cheapest of plasticware to work with.
I ended up putting in most of the ingredients, but it worked out well as all the other guys raved at the amount of meat and sauce. One of the other inmates came over today and even offered a beef log if I included him in the next meal I cooked. High praise indeed.